Today I'm back at the office, back to work, back in business! I have such a wonderful feeling inside, I don't know, its like that "today is the first day of the rest of your life" cliché has taken over my brain, filling me up with silly optimism. That's rare for me, to say the least, so I'm doing my best to savor it!
I mean... I started the work day by making a to do-list, the way I always do, and I'm actually crossing things off of it. I'm Getting Things Done! Few things are more satisfying to me than that feeling.
Before going home tonight, I'm heading to the gym to work out. That's quite the big deal for me, and an important part in my Project this fall: the Project to Turn Myself into a Happier and Healthier Person.
What I need to do to make this happen:
* Stress less. I've quit many of my job assignments, to go back to school (I'm taking a course in Creative Writing at the university - the first real class is tomorrow!) and to focus of my own writing projects. Now it's up to me to find a balance between work, school and my own writing (and the blog, of course!) that doesn't make me walk around with that constant and unsettling feeling of almost not making it. I have a habit of taking on more and more things until I simply can't take it anymore and get very, very sick for a long time. That's my body's way of letting me know that I've gone too far and that it's refusing to cooperating with me if I'm not going to treat it right. But that's not going to happen this fall. I won't let it. Health has to come first.
* Don't skip meals (and no, brownies does NOT count as a meal). I have terrible problems eating by myself, which means that when I'm alone, I basically live off of cookies, icecream, sandwiches and candy (oh, and breakfast, I always eat breakfast). Well, this stupidity is going to stop. Right now. I'm aware that I will get sick if I don't provide my poor body with the right nutrition, and from now on, I'm going to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner every day, and these meals are going to consist of food. The dishes can be extremely simple - I'm not expecting to become a contestant in Top Chef - as long as they fall into the category "normal food". (Note: this has nothing to do with losing weight. The opposite, actually. I'm sure I would feel better in every way if I managed to gain a few pounds.)
* Become much more active. The horrible truth is that I basically never move. At all. I walk down to the car, I get in, I drive where I'm going, I get out. Then I get back in the car, drive home, walk the 10 seconds back to the house. I tell myself I need to go for walks, and I do. About twice a month. Now, my plan is to go to yoga once a week - I love yoga, and the studio is located in the same house as my office, to I have no excuse not to go! - go to the gym once a week, and try to take a walk once a week. More than that and I know I'll just feel like it's too much and go back to doing nothing. Baby steps, you know. Again: I'm not trying to lose weight. I'm tired of having constant back pains, of panting and wheezing like I've just run a marathon every time I have to climb a flight of stairs, of having no energy whatsoever. I'm still young and I shouldn't allow my body to become that of an old woman.
* Seizing the day. Yeah, yeah, the World Championship of Clichés is being held right here in this post, I know. But come on, give me a break. We could all benefit from trying harder to appreciate all the good things in our lives, to be grateful for what we've got. I will never, ever stop grieving what I've lost, but all I can do is whatever I can to keep it from ruining my life. Giving up and drowning is my sorrows is not what Fanny would have wanted, and it's definitely not what I want for myself. There's beauty all around and I will try my best to see it, even if it means I'll have to staple my lids to my brows to keep my eyes open.
In the last issue of Sofis mode, I have a column that was actually inspired by this post. I know, it sounds so conceited to say that I was "inspired" by one of my own blog posts - of course that's not what I mean. I just got the idea for the column when I was writing that specific post, that's all.
And for the blogger feature, I had the pleasure of interviewing the adorable Kani Cao of K is for Kani! She is such a sweet and clever girl, and her style is the perfect mix between sophisticated vintage and young, fresh, colorful and trendy. If you haven't yet checked out her blog, you most definitely should!
NOTE: THIS IS NOT ME SINGING! I LOVE SINGING, I JUST CAN'T DO IT. OR, OF COURSE I CAN. IT JUST SOUNDS LIKE CRAP.
Let's end this post with a video of my dear, dear friend Zoey of MakeShiftModel singing a beautiful song with her mindblowingly angelic voice. Yeah, I am blown away by the fact that one person can be so full of amazing talents (and be incredibly stunning on top of it all), and my heart is simply overflowing with love and admiration for her! And just thinking that I would never have had the opportunity to get to know Zoey if I hadn't started this blog... "Meeting" all of you amazing people online these past three months are by far the best thing that's happened to me in a long, long time.
Now: lunch!
