Sunday, September 4, 2011

To die by your side, well, the pleasure, the privilege is mine.

Black over knee socks, tights and navy hat, Asos.com. Black denim shorts and grey blazer, Forever 21. The Smiths "The Queen is Dead" t-shirt, I've had it forever and don't remember where I got it. White patent boots, Dr Martens. The wonderful strawberry red satchel, The Leather Satchel Co.

(Photos by me.)


Hey, look! Even depressed people wear clothes! (At least some of us do. And at least some of the time.)

I've taken photos quite a few times this past week, but when going through them in the computer, I've felt like they photo are too dark (eh, literally - lighting-wise - not figuratively speaking), or that my outfits aren't original enough, or that I look too tired. (Yep, even those disgusting I'm not tall/skinny/pretty/young/long-legged enough thoughts have been poking me in the eye with their long, venomous fingernails.)

But you know what? Telling you the truth about what my life is like right now made all the difference. When I saw these photos again tonight - taken when I came home from school late one night this week - I couldn't help laughing at all of those pathetic I'm not good enough thoughts. Since when is style blogging about perfection, anyway?

I bought this The Smiths t-shirt when I was 15 and madly in love with Morrissey, and wow, it's been through a lot these past thirteen years. I'm amazed it's still in one piece!

When I started searching for old photos of myself wearing it a long time ago, I immediately got lost along memory lane - when I snapped out of it half an hour later, I decided I'll have to reminisce some other time. I have a feeling I might need a whole day to let my mind wander the way it tells me it needs to. At the moment, Ronnie is waiting for me to watch The Town with him, and that might be just a tad bit more important than finding photos where I'm wearing an old t-shirt.

But oh wow, I have soooo many old pics to show you later this week!

A few sneak peaks...










22 comments:

  1. woww!!! so pretty!
    great pics!

    sweetdifferences.com

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  2. I love The Smiths - what a great blog title! :)

    Your outfit is really neat, I've got my eye on the blue version of your blazer from Forever 21, just waiting on pay day! :)

    x

    http://fandabbydozie.blogspot.com/

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  3. Love it ! I WANT THIS BAG ! And the old photo are really fun :)




    xx




    www.coralieslooks.com - FRENCH FASHION BLOG

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  4. all those wonderful snapshots!

    http://honeybeelane.blogspot.com/

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  5. Wow, you have had a lot of different hair styles over the years! The first of the older ones reminds me of Amelie.

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  6. White doc martens! They're so cute, and they'd last three minutes in NYC ;) Based on my shoes you'd think I owned a wild, shoe-chewing dogs. That's what the streets do to shoes here.

    I hope you're starting to feel better. I know it takes time... By the way I read this great book that helped turn the tide of my depression this spring(that and summer started. I think I have seasonal affective disorder. I'm worried when autumn starts here...but not for two more months.)

    Anyway (don't judge!) it was a Deepak Chopra book. My mother laughed at me, but I got it anyway. I normally would have turned my nose up at it as well, but my friend Tara works with him and she's so wonderful it made me want to give him a chance...

    Anyway this was the most useful bit of advice in the book (and since your life is as unstructured as mine-- in that you freelance and create the structure for yourself-- thought it might help you, too) So just in case it can thought I'd share: Just try getting up at the same time every day, eating three healthy meals at around the same time, keeping the house neat (er ;)), make your bed every morning and then see how you feel in a week...

    For some reason that really, really, really, really helped me simple as that was. (From "Reinventing the Body, Resurrecting the Soul"). So just in case...

    Much love,
    Izzy
    www.misadventuresofme.com

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  7. Oh those nasty thoughts, we all have them and for someone who puts herself out there as much as you I am sure some negative thoughts find their way in. You are a lovely young woman (I know words from strangers cannot change what happens in those quiet moments alone) and yet I hope these words to help.
    I don't find your outfits boring. They have started to get a bit more dark, but hey guess what fall is approaching and I just felt it was an appropriate lighting choice :) see we your followers think you do things on purpose so when you share your challenges we appreciate it.
    Thanks for putting yourself out there and know the hardest critic is the one we see in the mirror as all we see is a lovely woman with killer style and we can't wait to see more!

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  8. There's a world in spanish to describe you: preciosa. Really. With all of your differents looks and hair's colors. I'm an hetero girl, so i'm not in love with you, but i'm soo jealous instead. I hope that little comment makes you smile a little. Don't be depressed =)

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  9. The color of that bag is perfection!

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  10. Cool outfit! Just looked down at my first-day-back-in-school-outfit and felt so boring. Btw, what did you think about The Town? I loved it. Xoxo/Lisa

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  11. Vart har du köpt dina skor? har letat överallt men kan bara hitta dem på nelly.com, och där finns dem inte i min storlek. Så himla snygga!

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  12. Kan inte minnas att jag har kommenterat tidigare men jag tänker ju ALLTID: Hur bär denna kvinna sig åt för att vara så ofantligt vacker? Men saken är den att du behöver inte bära dig åt ett dugg, du bara är just så vacker! Och hoppas du kan se det själv också :)

    Och inte bara det, så himla fin blogg i övrigt!

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  13. the photo where you're blond is the last evidence that amanda is your sister. I wasn't sure for a second whether it's you or her. good looks run in the family - your mother is a stunner, too. I am green with envy :)

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  14. wow, your lipstick looks just gorgeous..and the bag <3!!!

    would be great if you visit me too!
    xx

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  15. Wonderful photos! Just came over from Memoir Mode. You have such beautiful style! Love the hat and the bag here :)

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  16. Hej Annika! Blev ledsen av att läsa att du är deprimerad. Ibland när jag läser din blogg slås jag av hur höga krav du verkar ha på dig själv, försök att släppa det lite.. och om någon skickar elaka kommentarer så är det bara av rent avund och självförakt! Detta är iaf vad jag måste intala mig själv och förhoppningsvis nåt du redan vet :) Man får försöka ta tag i de ljusa stunderna, när livet känns lite lättare, uppskatta stunderna med sina nära och kära och acceptera när ångesten smyger sig på och allt känns meningslöst. Jag tycker iaf att du bara är bäst, älskar din blogg, din stil och dina funderingar! Fattar inte hur DU kan ha fuldagar förresten!

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  17. amazing look ! I love your cambridge satchel bag!
    kisses! :)

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  18. AND you like the Smiths! I'm officially in love with you. (and even though I'm already 24, a bit in love with Morrissey too)

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  19. Your hair and make-up looks GREAT!
    xx
    Shellena
    www.mintalamode.blogspot.com

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  20. Don't ever even think about hesitating about your looks! You are wonderfully skinny and you said that you don't work out practically at all! How is that even possible! You are definitely long-legged and tall and gorgeous ! And pf course you're young! There are bloggers who are even married and have children and they're wonderful.
    I admire you for wearing red lipstick all the time, because whenever I wear red lipstick I feel super-fabulous, but afterwards looking at the pictures(or the mirror) I feel like a drag-queen. I'm not really brave enough for such vibrant red lisptick as you wear.
    And the photos might be dark because of the climate. I hate that the night comes so early in the north, that just makes winter so much sadder..(Well, at first it's magical with the snow and everything, but in February I want light !)

    -Piia
    Bowtie Diary

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